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Author Topic: Men are like......(another for the ladies)  (Read 2776 times)

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flossie

For all those men who say, Why buy a cow when you can get milk for free. Here's an update for you: Now days, 80% of women are against marriage, WHY? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage.

1. Men are like .....Laxatives ..... They irritate the crap out of you.

2. Men are like.....Bananas..... The older they get, the less firm they are.

3. Men are like..... Weather..... Nothing can be done to change them.

4. Men are like ....Blenders .....You need One, but you're not quite sure why.

5. Men are like .....Chocolate Bars .... Sweet, smooth, & they usually head right for your hips.

6. Men are like .....Commercials  ..... You can't believe a word they say.

7. Men are like...... Department Stores .... Their clothes are always 1/2 off!

8. Men are like ......Government Bonds  ..... They take soooooooo long to mature.

9. Men are like .....Mascara..... They usually run at the first sign of emotion.

10. Men are like..... Popcorn ..... They satisfy you, but only for a little while.

11. Men are like..... Snowstorms .... You never know when they're coming, how many inches you'll get or how long it will last.

12. Men are like ......Lava Lamps ..... Fun to look at, but not very bright.

13. Men are like..... Parking Spots...... All the good ones are taken, the rest are handicapped.

Offline maps

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bicycles or women
« Reply #1 on: September 05, 2008 »
  • Publish
  • Why bicycles are better than Women...

    Bicycles don't get pregnant.

    You can ride your Bicycle any time of the month.

    Bicycles don't have parents.

    Bicycles don't whine unless something is really wrong.

    You can share your Bicycle with your friends.

    Bicycles don't care how many other Bicycles you've ridden.

    When riding, you and your Bicycle can arrive at the same time.

    Bicycles don't care how many other Bicycles you have.

    Bicycles don't care if you look at other Bicycle

    Bicycles don't care if you buy Bicycle magazines.

    You'll never hear, "Surprise, you are going to own a new Bicycle" unless you go out to buy one yourself.

    If your Bicycle goes flat you can fix it.

    If your Bicycle is too loose you can tighten it.

    If your Bicycle is misaligned, you don't have to discuss politics with it.

    You don't have to be jealous of the guy who works on your Bicycle.

    If you say bad things to your Bicycle, you don't have to apologize before you ride it again.

    You can ride your Bicycle as long as you want and it won't get sore.

    You can stop riding your Bicycle as soon as you want and it won't get frustrated.

    Your parents won't remain in touch with your old bicycle after you dump it.

    Bicycles don't get headaches.

    Bicycles don't insult you if you're a bad rider.

    Your Bicycle never wants a night out with the other Bicycles

    Bicycles don't care if you're late.

    You don't have to take a shower before you ride your bicycle.

    If your Bicycle doesn't look good you can paint it or get better parts.

    You can ride your Bicycle the first time you meet it, without having to take it to dinner, see a movie, or meet its mother.

    The only protection you have to wear when riding your Bicycle is a decent helmet.

    When in mixed company, you can talk about what a great ride you had the last time you were on your Bicycle.
     
    « Last Edit: September 05, 2008 by maps »
    EVERYDAY WHEN I WAKE UP, I THANK THE LORD I'M WELSH