One morning while making breakfast, the old Yorkshireman walked up to his wife and pinched her on her bum and said, "Tha' knows Lass, if tha' firmed this oop we could get rid of tha' girdle."
While this was on the edge of intolerable, she thought herself better and replied with silence. The next morning the man woke his wife with a pinch on the breast and said, "Tha' knows if tha' firmed these oop we could get rid tha' bra."
This was beyond a silent response, so she rolled over and grabbed him by the penis.
With a death grip in place she said, "Tha' knows if tha' firmed this oop we could get rid of t'postman, t'gardener, t'milk-man and tha' brother."......